This was a prosaic performance. For detailed notes, please refer to the appendix. The main details are summarised below in festive rhyme.


On the first day of Christmas Hackney gave to me, an unbeaten 2016.

On the second day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the third day of christmas, Hackney gave to me, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the fourth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the fifth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the sixth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the seventh day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, seven backs a running, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the eighth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, eight mighty forwards, 7 backs a running, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the ninth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, nine turning 30, eight mighty forwards, 7 backs a running, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the tenth day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me, ten points clear, nine turning 30, eight mighty forwards, 7 backs a running, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, Hackney gave to me eleven cheering ladies, ten points clear, nine turning 30, eight mighty forwards, 7 backs a running, six PJ side steps, five more points, four conversions, a 3 minute warm up, two new front row and an unbeaten 2016.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave me Ricky.


Appendix

2016 has not been unbeaten, however ‘the first half of the 2016/17 season was unbeaten’ missed the metre. Alex Higgs and Dave Lewis were the two new props. They both made excellent contributions, turning over the last two scrums. Higgs snaffled a couple of turnovers from kicks and Lewis made a wonderful one on one tackle on the breaking opposition winger. The warm probably lasted 5 minutes. The team were not warmed. Joe had another solid kicking day, landing all five kicks including a touchline tester. A bonus point was secured with five tries of varying quality. The pick being a clinical and highly accurate backs move which saw O’Hara cut out Dunlop and put Askham round the outside of the centres. Joe duly dummied the wing and put the brakes on, drawing in the fullback and releasing Watmore to score in the corner. Special mention also to a well executed zeros ball for the second try. The opposition back line were again distracted by the Dunloppotamus and Conner, went through with his trade-mark late fade. The remaining tries included PJ ignoring a two man overlap, Fraser ignoring an entire team and O’Hara booting it 100 yards for PJ to jump on.

A fine game was also enjoyed by MOTM Cian who injected energy when it was most needed, made a huge number of tackles and used his gaelic skills to cleanly regather a 22.

Wishing you all a very merry Christmas and, like Jesus, stay humble.